The Dark
by Scarlet Grave
Summary: Blue grew up hearing stories of her mother's Selection. Queen Eadlyn never planned to give the crown to her anxious second child. But when her son Kelly is reduced to the mental state of an eight year old she can't give him the crown. Blue's one stipulation is that she will be crowned queen if she can have a Selection. But the Selection pokes and prods at her weak mental state.
1. Chapter 1

I check my appearance in the monitor next to a camera as my mother says the final words of her address about the recent ship sinking on the coast of Swendway. She talks full of sadness, but not a tear slips from her eyes. I know she cried rehearsing it before, probably because of all the Swendish people close to her. The only person as close to her as Miss Neena and my father is Henri. I know she went out to visit Henri, given the accident in his homeland.

"Now we have my daughter, Princess Bluella Shreave, heir to the crown of Illéa," she says as she steps away from center stage. I take a breath and step up, smoothing the creases in my heavy gray skirt. Mom thought it was best to make my outfit resemble hers slightly, like an echo. Unlike her, though, I wear my hair loose around my shoulders, whilst hers is pinned up around her head and ears.

I stand in the middle of the stage, knowing millions on millions of people are looking at me right now, waiting for what I'll say, but I've never been as good at commanding crowds as my family.

"As many of you know I recently turned eighteen. Probably all of you, considering I'd broken my foot while at my party." The crowd ripples with laughter at the memory of one of my trademark clumsy acts. "Considering it's my eighteenth year I think it's time I gain company that's a little more... _interesting_." Another laugh. "I thought I had passed my boy crazy phase when Forgetting You had broken up, but recently I've been thinking more and more about who I'd like to marry, and I think it's about time I find out." A confused murmur runs across the crowd. "It's tradition for the heir to the throne to hold a Selection to find their true love, a man or woman of Illéa. Although I am not the firstborn of the Shreaves" I swallow "I would hope you'll all indulge me in the honour of holding my own Selection." The crowd claps and there are a few hoots. "All eligible men are invited to enter, but you only have until next week to enter. Traditionally it's two, for those of you old enough to remember my mother's Selection, but I'm a little impatient. My

mother met her love through a Selection, as did hers and I hope to as well."

I offer a broad grin of excitement at the thought of my love. I'm a little swept up in my fantasy because I trip over the hem of my dress, spilling across the floor. Everyone takes a colective gasp, but nobody moves. I lie face-first motionless on the floor for a beat before slowly picking myself up. My head lolls forward and blood drips down onto the floor.

"Blue?" I feel an arm lift me to my feet. "Are you alright?"

I nod my head slowly. I look to the side to see my older brother, Kelly, half carrying me offstage. The people talk nervously. I hear the host of _The Report_ , Johannes Raines try to calm the crowd.

"Please, everyone, the princess will be fine! She'll be back on next week to announce the contestants for the Selection!"

Kelly carries me down the hallway toward the hospital wing. I've been this way far too many times. I've broken almost as many bones as I have dishes. And that's saying something.

Next thing I know, I'm in the doctor's office. The all too familiar face of Dr. Gibbs hovers over my cot.

"Your Highness, not again! I just took your cast off!"

"I don't know what happened," Kelly tells him. "She slipped and fell."

The doctor prods my forehead. I clench my teeth in pain whilst he rubs circles around the cut. He holds it open, checking for dust

"Listen, Prince Kelly, I'm going to go get her some medicine. Make sure she doesn't fall asleep."


	2. Life's Stresses

The princess was not healed by the next _Report._ It just so happens she had an unsightly bandage strapped across her forehead. Luckily, Mom agreed to announce my canidates for me, and for the past few days I've been pouring over their pictures, trying to memorize their names.

"Lennon, Isaac, Ronan, Gale, Orrin…" I sigh and clutch my undone hair in frustration. _Lennon, Ronan, Orrin_ how do I memorize that? I've been trying to memorize my suitors names to no avail.

"Your Highness?" my maid asks, touching my shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"No. I think I need to travel beyond these walls," I reply with another sigh. Without a word she begins braiding my hair. I close my eyes. I've always loved people playing with my hair. It's quite relaxing. Head massages are the best.

Adelaide wraps an elastic around the bottom of the braid. I sigh at the fact it's all done. I know she wants to send me to the library. It's been driving her nuts that I haven't left her alone to get anything done.

"Pants today, I think," I tell her as she moves to my wardrobe. I trust Adelaide with most of my wardrobe choices. Either her or my mother pick what I wear every day. I know nothing about fashion, but they both clearly have an eye for style.

She lays out a pair of fitted black pants and a loose blue top on the bed. She then turns into my bathroom, probably to tidy up a bit. I quickly change before she returns. Even though I've known Adelaide since I was seven, I always feel awkward changing around her. Maybe it's _because_ we know each other so well. Sometimes I feel like she's my second sister. And I'd never change in front of Kenna.

When I finish getting changed I head off to the Newsome Library. Likely, my mother won't be there, but Kenna might be. She's either there or working in a project in her room. Somebody will be there, maybe even cousin Eadlyn (named after my mother by her brother) who's been visiting since Uncle Ahren and Aunt Daphne had to go to a conference in New Asia.

I hear a friendly chatter in the library. I don't know who I want to talk to most about my selection. Eadlyn is sweet, Kenna is smart, Miss Neena is a good listener, Mom has been through the same thing I'm going through. Adelaide would also be a good choice, but she's working.

I step into the room, watching the women gathered around the glossy piano. My mother sits at the piano, with a flock of women centered around her. people always center themselves around her. They share a laugh at something I don't quite catch. I watch them for a few moments before a brunette head appear beside me.

"Why're ya looking so… Blue?" Kenna asks.

"Oh, ha ha," I say, glaring over my shoulder at her. "I'm not sad. I'm just thinking about my Selection. It's…" I shake my head.

"Nervous?" she asks.

"Not at all, may I remind you that _they're_ fighting over _me_."

"Bluella!" my mother snaps. "This is harder than you think it is."

I walk into the room and take a seat a few feet away from them. "Then what's the proper way of handling this?"

"Approach them like humans," Eadlyn says. Her accent makes her words sound so musical. "That's what they are, right?"

"Don't send a third of them home on the first day," Mom says. We all laugh. I've seen the tapes of my mom kicking people out with a flick of her wrist, or a simple "no".

"Have you gone through their profiles yet?" Miss Neena asks. I nod. "Any standouts?"

"Definitely, but it's kind of hard to pick them based on their pictures There are some lookers in there though." My mind drifts off to a boy with dark hair and eyes and another with a sharp jaw and a strong nose.

"Is that so...Maybe I should hold a Selection of my own," Kenna says.

"Oh my God, yes! It'll be great! We can pick out music and food and decorations and everything!" I say.

"Have you done any of that, then Blue?" Mom asks.

"Yeah, Adelaide and I got that all finished yesterday," I say. My mother purses her lips.

"You depend too much on Adelaide, she won't be here forever," she responds.

"Miss Neena is still here for you," I point out. Miss Neena smiles at my mom.

"No, Neena is here for Neena," she corrects me. "Just because I'm queen doesn't mean everybody has to think of me before themselves."

Miss Neena's smile grows even more. She loves my mom so much. I wonder how Adelaide thinks of me?

We're all snapped out of our trance at my mother's all-over amazingness by a soft knock at the door. We turn to see Kelly standing at the door, hands folded in front of him. Of course. He's the only man regularly allowed in the library.

"Hey, Kelly!" I say with a grin. "Come sit over here." I pat the spot next to me. He smiles and walks toward me.

I love Kelly. He has the same mind as an eight year old, but has the body of a twenty year old. His heart stopped when he was eight, cutting off the oxygen to his brain. After that Kelly just hasn't been developing properly. He's a sweetheart, but he can't handle being ruler. He just wants to sit around playing games and watching movies, which is fine with me.

He leans in next to me. "Blue, I think I ripped my tiger again."

"Kelly!" I say with a laugh. His smile falters, trying to tell if he's in trouble or not. "Well, let's go."

Kelly trails me out of the library toward his room. I have a smile on my face so large I feel like I'm going to break. Between my Selection and having such a great brother, everything's coming up Blue.

The guards watch Kelly and I through our trek in the cavernous halls toward his room. They all smile when they see him. You can't help but love Kelly. He's so loving and innocent, you feel bad telling him anything other than what he wants to hear. We stop at his door, I'm ready to see the damage he's done to his favorite tiger.

I cross the room to his bed where his plus tiger sits. I sit down and turn the tiger over in my hands looking it over for tears.

"I dunno...I don't see any tears," I tell him. I look up to see him shifting uncomfortably. My brow twists up in worry. "What's wrong?"

"Are you really looking for a husband?" he asks, his eye watery. "I don't want anybody to take you away."

"Oh, Kelly," I say, getting up to hug him. My voice is muffled by his shirt, but I keep talking. "Nobody's going to take me away. They'll be coming here to me."


	3. Selected

**A/N: Hello my pretties, thanks for sticking around until this third chapter. I just want t point out that right now I don't actually know who Eadlyn chose in her Selection, so I'm just making guesses. In that sense Blue's dad won't be that big of a part of the story.**

Today I finally get to meet the Selected. I can hardly keep still while Zia does my make up ad it's clearly getting on her nerves.

"Your Highness, please sit still," she chides.

"Sorry, I'm just so excited," I say, shifting again. She sighs and puts down her brush. I look up at her confused.

"I'm done," she says. I look in the mirror. I look beautiful, but still like me. Zia works miracles. She could've made me anything, but she kept me as myself. At least the Selected will recognize me.

I push myself away from the dressing table. My midnight blue gown swings out in front of me. Once again my maids drew inspiration from my mother's Selection. Instead of a black gown they gave me a floor length blue number that's fitted to the mid thigh before flaring out in ruffles. Hale helped design this one. I love his work. Even with my limited fashion sense I know what he can do is something else.

I hurry down the hall,careful not to slip on the edge of my gown. The layers flared out in front of me make the process slower. Finally I reach the top of a stairwell in a grand hall on the way to the Men's Room.

A guard lets the first boy in. He walks to me. I smile. I remember him. Tyson Linder, the boy with a sharp jaw.

"Your Highness," he says with a low bow. "My name is Tyson Linder, and I'm here to compete for your hand."

He rises from his bow to meet my gaze. He seems confused about something...but what? What've I done to offend him? I haven't even done anything.

"Is something wrong?" I ask, a higher note creeping into my voice. I'm already messing up the first meeting with my first suitor. Suddenly I can't breathe. I press my hand lightly against my stomach.

"No it's just...have I done something wrong? Don't you usually curtsy?" he asks, chewing his lip. I release the tension in my shoulders. I didn't even know it was there until it was gone. I can breathe. I can laugh. I almost do.

"I think you're confused Mr. Linder. I am the crowned princess of Illéa. I bow to no one." There's a beat of silence. "The Men's Room is that way."

After that it's a parade of faces I kind of recognize. There are no real standouts. A few don't even look in my eyes. They keep their gaze focused downward. I guess I'm not the only one who's nervous.

The guard lets in a boy with a deep tan and a fitted suit. He's good looking, but I'm definitely blanking on his name. He approaches me. By God, he's tall. He looks down at me, looking to and away from my face. His mouth moves like a fish, but nothing comes out. He seems nervous. Even more so than me, if that's possible.

"Are you quite alright?" I ask, reaching out to touch his arm.

"Uh...yeah. Hi." He give me a nervous smile. He bows awkwardly, hitting his head off mine. I take a step away, my hand pressed to my forehead. "I mean, Your Majesty."

" _Highness_ ," I correct. "I most surely am not majestic."

"I know the feeling." He taps his forehead. "Clearly."

We laugh. When it dies down we're just looking at each other. "What's your name?"

"Hm? Oh. Kenai DeDuc."

"Bluella Shreave," I say, sticking out my hand. He shakes it once.

"Men's Room is that way." He walks down the hall, and I find myself watching him go. My smile lingers as the next boy walks to me.

"Your Highness?" the boy asks. My attention snaps back to him. My mouth hangs open. I have nothing to say. The moment stretches on and I still can't tell him anything. I feel anxiety creep into the back of my mind. I want to say something to him, but I can't talk. I can't breathe. I'm going to die. I can feel it. I feel like I'm about to turn into ice and shatter into a million pieces or explode into flames.

And then there's nothing.

No breath. No words. The boy isn't there anymore. I can't see. I can't move. I can't feel. Fail. Misery. Panic. Depression. Death. Fear. Nightmare. Fail, misery, panic, depression, death, fear, nightmare. Failmiserypanicdepressiondeatfearnightmare. _Failmiserypanicdepressiondeathfearnightmare._

 _Help me_.

I feel a hand on my stiff shoulder. Something inside me clicks and I can see through fog. I'm crying and I don't know why. I see the boy looking down at me.

"Bluella? Bluella?" His words sound garbled through the thick layer of unprovoked terror I feel.

"I think I need to sit down."

Against my will I lie down on my side, curled up in a ball. My everything hurts. I feel a pair of arms wrap around me and start carrying me down a hall, but I'm disconnected from reality. I can see what happens, but I can't react. I can't process anything. All I know is I'm scared and I'm going to die.

"Get the queen!" the boy screams as he carries me down the hall. He swings himself into a parlor, setting me on the couch. I can't stop crying and I don't know why. I'm so so scared. Somewhere in the back of my mind I know I'm in no danger, that this is just an anxiety attack, but that place is locked away to me.

"Blue!" my mother shouts as she enters the room. My muscles shake at how tightly theyère locked. She walk to my side, wrapping her arms around my shoulders. "Breathe. Oh God, please breathe."

I try to breathe, and I can now that I'm in the safe place of my mother's arms. I lean my head into her. I still can't talk but I can hear them talk.

"Who are you?" my mother barks at the boy. Dad places his hands on her back. They glare at him.

"My name is Erza Winters. I was there when... when it happened."

"Nobody can _ever_ know about this, do you understand me?" Mom shouts. Ezra nods hurriedly. "Tell the rest of the Selected that Bluella has been called to do some business with me. She will not be able to visit with them for the rest of the day. Direct them to the Men's Room. Prince Kelly will direct you there."

I didn't even notice Kelly standing in the corner. He looks almost as scared as me. He twists his fingers in front of himself.

"Is Blue gonna be okay?" he asks. I offer him an unstable smile.

"I'll be fine. Promise," I say in a hoarse voice. I hate lying to Kelly, but I really have no choice. I don't want him to know; to see the terror I live in every day. The impending knowledge that there will always be another shutdown, another nightmare, and there's nothing I can do about it.

 **A/N: Well, this chapter certainly got dark. The Selection will continue and will have romance, but, Blue does suffer from an anxiety disorder and this was as close as I could get to her. Plus this was getting to be a dull scene.**


	4. Scars

Adelaide zips up the back of my dress. It's tight to the waist before it becomes loose and flowy. The dress reaches only to my knees, but I don't need gown. I am not my mother. I like being girly. I'm strong enough to be seem as weak sometimes. My hair is a tumble of dark reddish brown curls down my back. They reach to the bottom of my ribs. My great grandmother had the same hair, minus the redness.

"I think you're set to go," Zia says from my dresser. She looks up and down me. "You look so like your mother."

I smile. Zia also does my mother's hair and makeup when she doesn't do it herself. She's one of the few who knows what Mom looks like without a full face of makeup. Everyone knows what I look like without makeup; I hardly wear it if I'm going to our pool. And leaks are leaks. Mom and Dad were outraged when they saw pictures of their teenage daughter lounging at their pool in a bikini and loose T-shirt in magazines.

Adelaide opens the door and ushers me out. She's excited to hear about the guys. She wants me to grow up, to find someone for more than a quick kiss behind the stables. I think after eleven years of friendship she's ready to settle down and doesn't want to leave me alone.

My heeled sandals click-clack on the floor as I make my way to the Men's Room. I used to always ask Mom why we have a Men's Room and not a Women's Room. She always said the same. Gramma renamed the Women's Room into the Newsome Library after a friend.

A guard opens the heavy wooden doors to the Men's Room before me. The doors there are so large when I try to open them I usually fall. I'm small, I'm weak, I wear flimsy dresses. What nobody know is how resilient I am. How inside my own mind there are nightmares, poised like vipers ready to attack.

All heads turn to me when I enter the room. The speech I had prepared slips out of my mind. My breathing stops. I try to focus on my lungs, air in, air out. My chest trembles with unsteady breaths. I wring my hands. Make something up. Oh, God just make something up.

"Um...hi," I say with an award wave. A couple boys laugh and some just stare. "Due to unforeseen circumstances," I lock eyes with Ezra for a moment, "I was not able to meet all of you yesterday. I had important business to take care of for my mother throughout the evening. This is accurate to how life is for will be for one of you once we marry. The work is never done. There will be sacrifices you will have to make. There are sacrifices I have to make. Moments are missed for the betterment of our country. Luckily for you, though, moments are made up. Like now. I have organized for tea to be taken here. The food will arrive soon." I offer them a last winning smile before stepping away from the front of the room. I walk toward Kelly who's in conversation with a boy I don't know.

"Hi, Kelly," I say, sinking next to him on the couch. The boy across from us looks down at his feet. I almost laugh. Is he scared of me? A petite girl in a rose print dress. I bump his knee with my bare one sticking out of my dress. He looks up at me. "Hey," I say with a smile.

"Hi," he says with a tight lipped smile. I know for a fact I always look cute and sweet, I've seen myself on the Report.

"We haven't met, have we?" I say with a tilt of my head I hope is endearing. Judging by his reaction, it is. After a long pause he shakes his head. Kelly leaves to seek more interesting conversation not made up entirely of speaking through looks. "I'm Blue. What's your name, then?"

"Lennon," he says. That vaguely rings a bell somewhere. I recognize his eyes. A very light blue. They're trained on me. Blue eyes trained on Blue. He's too aware. Too aware of the space between us. Too aware of me. He can't be offset of his balance. His balance of not talking, not revealing.

I lean in close so my head is practically on his shoulder. So my lips are at his ear. "Are you scared of me, Lennon?" He breathes heavily against my shoulder. "Well I'd consider changing that if you want to stay here." I say. My breath tickles the hair next to his ear. Message received, I guess. I move away from him and towards the cart of desserts that has been brought in.

I pick up a plate and immediately down. The cart is mostly sweets, something I don't particularly care for. They're sickly sweet, and while I do eat the occasional Swendish dessert from Henri I almost never eat anything sweet. They make me sick. The most I can handle is a dessert wine. I pour myself a cup of tea. I like tea.

I lean back up against a wall, curling over toward my cup. I take a sip and smile. Nothing beats a nice cup of tea, no matter life's stresses. I tap my perfect nails against the cup. I like my nails. They're short, but perfect ovals. I can't afford to have long nails. I love sports, I love crafting, I'd break my nails were they longer.

"Your Highness?" a boy asks. I cock my head to the side to look at him with a lopsided grin. Mom says when I do that to people they're "charmed".

"Hiya," I say with a small laugh. The boy smiles back broadly.

"Tobias Raines," he tells me with a shake of my hand.

"Bluella Shreave," I say. "Clumsiest member of the royal family."

"I'll say," he laughs. "Did you recover from that?"

"From what?" I ask, still smiling.

He brushes his fingers across my forehead. Suddenly I can't move. This guy is slick. Definitely slick. I close my eyes for a moment while his fingers linger on my smooth skin. He drops his hand and my eyes snap open.

"Um...yeah. I did. They think it's going to scar, though." My cheeks are burning a bright red. He knows exactly how much I like his touch.

"That's okay, scars remind us of where we've been." My entire body tightens. He doesn't know. He can't know. Nobody's seen them.

"I have to go," I say coldly. I walk away, leaving him behind me. He goes home. Tonight.

The guards on this side of the door open the door for me and I march out. I can't go back to my room, not like this. I may accidentally lash out at Adelaide or Zia. I turn off toward the indoor swimming pool Mom and Dad got after my less than voluntary magazine spread. I keep a T-shirt and swimsuit in a locker down there.

I open the door and slam it shut behind me. I lock it quickly. I need to be alone.

Quickly I change out of my dress and into a bikini. I pull a loose shirt over my torso so I don't have to look at the scars across my ribs. The puckered skin of my chest hit me in one second and hasn't left me since. Why, why because of a single moment do I live as a deformity? Why can't I be smooth, sculpted like my mom?

I hate myself.

I dive face first into the still water, knowing I'll be able to feel beautiful there, despite my running makeup and disheveled hair. As I stroke back and forth, I ponder the boys.

Tobias and Ezra easily know too much about my mind and body. Great. All I need now is for someone to find out something bad about my soul. I think I have a good personality. I'm nice, I care about people. Even though I'm afraid I'll be a good leader.

Tobias doesn't know about my scars. He can't. Well, he might now. My reaction definitely tipped him off. But without reason what is now only suspicion will be turned to fact in his mind. He will leave, just not until I find reason. Or reason enough for me, I guess. I am princess and my word is not to be questioned.

Questions.

I pull myself out of the pool. I wrap myself quickly in a towel and rush down the hall, trying to avoid the Selected.

 **A/N: Well this got dark. Do not fret, though! It will become significantly less dark. Or lighter, I guess.**


	5. Questions

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p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""'What are your goals in life?' Do not disappoint me."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I leave down the hall towards Mom's office. She'll be proud when she hears my idea. She likes good ideas. She told me I need to make cuts, but not too many. That was her first mistake. And not her last. She told me over and over it was harder than I thought every time I asked to host one. I open her door and sit heavily on a chair facing her desk./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""What is it, Blue?" she asks, not looking up from her work./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""I had an idea for picking the losers," I say, continuing before she can say anything. "I'm testing them with a question each week for compatibility I'll being announcing the worst answers on the /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"Report./spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" The best answer will win a date with me so I can get to know them better."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""Mmm hmm…" Her eyes are locked on her papers./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""What's wrong, Mom?" I ask, leaning over her desk./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""It's you," she says. "All anyone can talk about is how they barely know you, how they can't see inside your Selection. How would you solve this?"/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I think for a moment./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""A photo shoot, maybe? On the date?"/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"She props her chin up on her hand, a wrinkle appearing between her dark eyebrows. "Would you be opposed to an interview?" she asks./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""What?" I know she'll get her way, no matter how much power I have, she'll always control me because she's my mother./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""An interview and a photo shoot for a magazine. By yourself. About you." She challenges me with an arch of her eyebrow./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""About what?" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"She dismisses my question with a wave of her hand. "Nothing really. What's your favorite colour, what do you want in a husband? Nothing important."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""I'll think about it," I tell her, fully intending to say, no, sorry, too busy./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""Well think fast," she says, thumbing through a folder. "The interview is tomorrow."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I say nothing. There's no sense in arguing with my mother. There's something in her, a dark talent for wrapping people around her little finger. Now that something's in me. Just like her dark hair and pixie-like nose, I got my persuasiveness from her./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"A Zia and Adelaide sit around my bed with my dressmaker, Hidna, playing cards. Hinda is so rarely in my room; it's like seeing a unicorn./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""A package arrived for you, my lady," Adelaide says./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""Ugh, don't call me that," I say. "You're older than me; it's just too weird."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I sit down heavily at my chair. I listen to the talk of the palace. The gossip so interesting. It's indulgence; one of many I'm denied because of my lifestyle. I begin flipping through the answers. Most of them are the same: family, wife, comfortability, longevity. I flip to the page of one Hollis Penn. His answer makes me cringe. /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"To be with you./spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" Sorry, honey, my goals in life aren't to be married to me. But that's not what gets to me. What gets to me is the dishonesty. Nobody lies to me, and /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"nobody /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"spends their whole life dreaming of being with someone they don't know. I set his paper aside./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I keep going but stop at a page for a boy named Kenai. His name faintly rings a bell. I remember him, he's the boy almost as awkward as me. I chew my lip. I don't know if I want him to stay or not. He makes me laugh, but he also makes a lot of mistakes. I scan his answer. /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I don't know./spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" Unlike Hollis, he's brutally honest. I like honesty./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I set aside his paper. I don't bother paging through all the rest of the questions. I have a winner, I have a loser. I have enough. I don't need anymore. I don't want to see the words of the greatest desires I can't provide, /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"love/spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;", /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"family/spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;", /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"happiness/spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;". Will they be disappointed when they found out who I am? I've never wanted a kid. If I had one I'd want to be there for him or her, but with everything knocking around my head I'd be a bad mother. My husband would leave me./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I pick myself up and sit across from Zia./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""Deal me in."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"strongspan style="font-size: 14.6667px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"A/N: Hey, guys! I hope this makes up for the last mad-depressing chapter. This one certainly had its moments, but I think it was a nice chapter. Tomorrow; The Report./span/strong/p 


	6. The Report

p id="docs-internal-guid-4a42c8c6-6b35-4ab9-2e98-ffa619b6ba10" dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"My hair hangs loose down to my ribs. The curls are held back by a jeweled necklace that Mom thought would be interesting. It vaguely reminds me of the crown that'll be placed on my head in a few years. I shudder. The country will be left to me in nearly perfect condition. My training is more about maintaining the country and trusting myself./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I love this dress Hinda designed me. It's fitted to the top of my hipbones before it slightly belling out onto the floor. It has the same colours and geometric shapes as a pane of stained glass. I think I look magnificent. Like a queen. Like my mom. Like her mom./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"The /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"Report/spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" drags on and on forever. I've never really been interested listening to the state of our country, as told by the same voice who sang me to sleep as a child. Sometimes I find it hard to recognize her as a queen instead of just Mom. It's odd to hear people so respectful to Kenna or Kelly, because I know who they are behind the public facade. They're goofy kids like me who love pancakes and gardens. We're no better than anybody else, but we're placed on a pedestal so high everybody is forced to look up to us./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""...so we plan to invest 3% more on smaller classes," she says. I love budgets. The math is so easy; so smooth. There's only one answer, and I have to find it. She steps back to her throne and casts a sidelong glance at me./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""And now, the country's least eligible bachelors, the Selected," Johannes Raines says. He moves to Lennon. Oh no. "So what has been your impression of Princess Bluella?"/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"Oh no. Please, God, no./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""She's definitely.../spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"intense./spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"" He pauses. "I guess that's a trend in Shreave women."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"The room has a round of chuckles at our expense. It has been well documented that the women in my family are very stubborn. Mom says it's a strong personality. We're...opinionated to say the least./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""And what about you, young man?" Johannes asks, moving to a boy I can't really remember. Robert...Romeo...something with an "R" maybe. "Would you agree?"/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""She isn't really what I expected. Not in a bad way, of course," he adds hurriedly. "But she's a lot sharper than I thought she'd be. We all know she's beautiful, but she's also adorable. That's not something I expected."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"Kenna slaps my arm. I turn to her, slightly annoyed. She's only fifteen, but she's boy-crazy. She wiggles her eyebrows at me with a smirk across her face. I laugh. Maybe a little too loud, considering all eyes turn to me. I turn red under my makeup./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""We can see that," Johannes says with a broad smile, his eyes crinkling on the corners. He moves to Ezra. "Have you found anything unexpected about the princess?"/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""She's stronger than I thought she'd be," he says, locking eyes with me. "All we see is a brain and a face and pretty dresses, but what we don't see is her will and the strength inside her."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"Mom grabs my hand. She looks down at me in a motherly way. I miss this look. Ever since I was crowned the heir she's treated me less like a daughter and more like a princess. Sometimes I like being a princess, but sometimes I'd rather be an ordinary girl. I'd rather have ordinary siblings and a mother who holds me and be able to go outside and wear a bikini and fall in love on my own terms./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"Johannes keeps questioning the boys, and Mom never lets go of my hand. Kenna keeps leaning over to whisper jokes about the boys' answers. I smile and try to hold my composure but sometimes I can't help but laugh. The oppressive seriousness of my mother's address is replaced by a light hearted joking nature between all of us./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""All right then," Johannes says, stepping away from the risers where the Selected site. "Now, let's talk to the ever stunning Princess Bluella Shreave."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I smile and walk towards him. I stumble slightly, but he catches my elbow. Maybe such a belled gown was a bad idea./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""It's alright, ladies and gentlemen, I've got her," he jokes before letting me stand on my own. "So, Your Highness, you haven't given anybody the boot yet, have you?"/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""Well, no," I say, chewing my lip. "I've been kind of reluctant to...they're all so nice!"/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""The ladies will be /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"chasing /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"these men when they go," Johannes laughs, trying to make my awkwardness. "Don't feel too bad."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""Okay…" I say with fake slowness. I nod. "I think I'm ready."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""Alright, /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"madame/spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;", whose heart will you break first?"/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I look out at the camera. My brow twists up in remorse. Am I making a bad decision? I am. Too late now. "It...it is with a heavy heart that I send Hollis Penn back to Hondurauga."/span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"Hollis's face droops. And, goddammit, Tobias leans back in his chair. /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"Next week, buddy/spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;". I go back to my throne. Johannes tries to wrap up the show on a high note, and almost succeeds. I love him. He's like an uncle./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"I watch as the Selected file off the stage. I walk up behind Kenai./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"span style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" /spanspan style="font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;""Wait up for me," I say, close to his neck. His shoulders tense. I walk away before he can turn around. Hopefully he does wait up./span/p  
p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;"strongspan style="font-size: 14.6667px; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"A/N: Don't worry if you don't like Kenai. This is one date, there will be many more. Tell me who you think would be a good match for Blue./span/strong/p 


	7. Midnight Date

I knock against Kenai's door. I didn't know where I was going with this date. It's kind of weird. I don't know what I was thinking. But it's too late to turn away and hide because Kenai has already opened the door. I look behind him. There's no butler in his room. I push him into his room.

"You have five minutes to change into something else," I say, holding onto his suit.

"Like what?" he asks.

"Like this," I say, stepping away. I keep my hands on his chest, though, but more lightly. Simply resting there. He takes in my T-shirt, jeans and sneakers. Casual. I check my watch. "Now you have four minutes."

I step out of the room and lean against the door. I carefully count the seconds as he changes.

Two hundred and thirty seven seconds later…

"Where are we going?" he asks, now more sensibly in jeans.

I press my finger to my lips in the universal _quieter_ symbol. He understands and shuts his mouth. Tentatively I lace my fingers in his and lead him down the hall. He makes more noise than I would maybe like, but we're not all adept at navigating dark palace hallways. I stumble a little bit on the edge of a new rug, but he hold my elbow, he pulls me a little closer to him.

"Where are we going?" he whispers. My breath catches. I've never been so close to a boy that isn't Kelly or an uncle type character.

"Tour of the palace," I breathe back. I set myself a little farther away from him and wait for my head to stop spinning. I lead him into the one place I know will be always lit; the Keskiyö Ballroom.

We have three ballrooms, but the grandest is the Keskiyö Ballroom, a gift from my father to my mother after they married. He designed it to have an open ceiling so when night falls you can clearly see everything. It's light and airy instead of the heavy drapery and rugs in the other ballrooms. It has polished marble floors and is always kind of cold.

Kenai gasps as I throw open the doors. I laugh, watching his reaction. The silvery light makes the place seem almost godly, like a temple of starlight.

I feel like we could stand there forever as he takes in the grandeur. Instead I sprint across a bit of the floor before dropping to one knee and sliding across the floor. Before I run out of momentum I turn to face him. He looks confused.

"The floor is ideal for sliding," I tell him. "Come along, then. We have a lot to do before The sun comes up."

He slides across the floor before falling face first on the gray floor. I clap my hands over my mouth to silence my laughter. I think if I was laughing aloud the guards would think I'm being killed due to my screams. I collapse on the ground, still laughing at him.

"That was pathetic," I laugh.

"Not all of us have ballrooms to practice sliding across," he responds. I pull myself up into a regal position.

"That'll be my first order of business," I say. "Besides, this is the closest I'll ever come to skating."

"Really?" he asks. "You've never been skating?"

I shake my head. "It doesn't exactly snow in Angeles. This is the closest I have to free time. I work from sun up to sun down, but the night is all mine."

"Then when do you sleep?" he asks. I lie down, facing the skylight. Kenai comes over to lie down next to me and we watch the night sky.

"Sleep?" I joke. "What's that? Seriously, I have no time for anything. After the Selection I don't think I'll have time for a good relationship. And you know... _other stuff._ "

He laughs at the innuendo. "Wouldn't you want a husband to help you out?"

"No. If I found someone I truly loved I wouldn't want them to have the same struggle as me." We sit in silence for a few moments. It could be seconds, it could be hours.

I get up and dust off my pants. He stands up and we start moving out of the room.

"Where are we going?" he asks.

"My favorite place in the palace," I tell him as we walk down the hall. "Nobody knows about it but me. I haven't been there in forever."

"Where is it?" he asks when we stop at an empty wall.

"Here," I say, running my finger over the molding on the bottom of the wall. I feel a knot in the wood and push my finger in. It gives in with a click and a panel of wood swings in. I stand back up and lean against his shoulder.

"I used to come here all the time whenever...whenever things got bad," I whisper. "It was a place I could hide from the guards and maids and my parents and sibling and everyone, but ever since I was crowned as heir I've had a hard time getting back here. In this giant castle it's the only place I feel entirely safe."

"Can we go in?" he asks.

I look up and smile at him.

 **A/N: What did you guys think of this first date? Who should it be with? And who should Blue end up with? I have no idea. honestly just going chapter by chapter at this point. Tomorrow Blue has an interview to try and win over the public. Should be...interesting.**


	8. The Interview

"My lady?" I open my eyes to see Adelaide standing over me. She holds a light white gown we had decided on for the interview. My mother said she wanted people to see me as innocent and girlish, just looking for a boy. Not as the single most powerful teenager in the country.

"Any time for a shower?" I ask. I spent hours with Kenai in the tiny confines of the small cabinet. We talked about everything from the exact moment you're dead and the motion paradox. Nobody's ever as interested as me in theoretical sciences as me. He didn't seem to know a much as me, but he let me talk.

"I'm afraid not," she answers. "You can go wash up if you want."

"Alright," I say. I'm dead tired, but if I want time to be just a girl I have to give up time to rest. I walk across my large room towards the bathroom. I pass Zia at my nightstand, where she's waiting to erase the dark circles under my eyes. I start when I see the zombie in my mirror. At least I have the palace's best makeup artist on the case. I begin brushing my teeth and turn on the sink as hot as it goes. I spit into the steaming marble bowl. I look up. At least the steam seems to be helping. I brush my hair until it's soft and untangled. I turn off the sink and go back to my room.

"Ready?" Zia asks, holding a brush next to my face. I nod once. She brings the brush covered in some sort of tan liquid down my face.

The makeup actually doesn't take that long, because I still look like me. A healthier better-rested me. Adelaide hands me the loose white dress and I pull it onto my body, self conscious of the women in my room. Then Zia does something called a "waterfall braid" comprised of braided and loose, straight hair.

Adelaide walks my down into the Keskiyö Ballroom. I remember watching Kenai falling flat on his face and lightly giggle. Adelaide looks sideways at me. I shake my head in an _I'll tell you later_ gesture.

A polished looking woman walks toward me will a smile so large it looks like her face might crack open.

"Good morning, Your Highness," she says in an annoyingly peppy voice. Adelaide takes that as a queue to leave.

"Please," I say. "Call me Blue."

"Alright Your...um Blue, let's take a seat," she says, gesturing to a set of chairs in front of large studio lights. I know that the overly-bright lights won't do wonders for me. I sit in the chair to the left, as I always do.

"Alright so," she says, pulling out a notebook and pen, "how's the Selection going?"

"Oh, pretty well," I tell her. "It's been hard trying to get time to go on dates with all the boys. I have a lot of work to do to prepare to rule, which I like fine enough, but I'd like to have more time for friends and love and regular things."

"And how do you make time for yourself?"

"Well, the only free time I have is at night, so after sundown I go swimming in our indoor pool or just kind of wander around."

"Oh really? How will you make time for the Selection?"

"Well, right now that is my job. Don't get me wrong, it's a lot of fun, but I'll have even less time to find someone when I'm queen I'll have even less time to find someone."

"Are there any front runners right now?"

"Well, yes. I'm planning to contact someone for a date later today."

"And what kind of dates are you planning?"

"Playing chess in the parlor, I'm quite good at that, or maybe going out to the garden. Going to a movie or walking around the palace, anything I can just spend time with him at."

"And what sort of husband are you looking for?"

"Someone who doesn't judge me, is willing to put me before themselves and gives good hugs."

She laughs. "What kind of things would you like your husband to be good at?"

"Hugs, obviously." Another laugh. "Math, theoretical physics, logic, all the things I'm interested in."

"You like math?"

"Yeah, I like the cleanness and simplicity."

"I think that's all we'll need."


	9. Enough Photos

**A/N: Sorry for the gap between the last chapter and this. Exams are a bitch, but y'all didn't come here for excuses, you came for romance, and I will not disappoint.**

I lied to that interview lady. I don't intend to date a boy today. I don't have favorites, though there are standouts. Namely Ezra, Tobias, Lennon and Kenai, though most of them are standouts for bad reasons. I lean against a wall and close my eyes. Sometimes I come to this hall to see the sun.

I tilt my face up to the sun and focus on relaxing my neck, shoulders, arms, hands, fingers. As soon as my muscles are relaxed I hear a camera snap and tense up again. I open my eyes and turn to the left to see a boy my age looking down at a camera.

"It came out beautifully," he says looking up at me.

"Why did you do that?" I ask quietly. I don't know that he heard me and to be frank I don't care.

"Because you're beautiful," he says.

I guess he did hear me. Oh.

"There are already enough pictures of me in the world." And it's true. Every time I wear something new there's a picture. Every time I go out there's a picture. It seems every time I breathe there's a picture.

"That's impossible." I laugh.

"Forgive me," I say, "but I can't remember your name."

"It's fine, Your Highness," he responds. "My name is Gabriel."

"Gabriel," I repeat quietly to myself. I nod, deciding that Gabriel is a nice name. A good name. If I had a son I may want to name him Gabriel. I walk away from him down the hall. I think I like this Gabriel.

But right now I need to speak with somebody else. Somebody who maybe knows more than he says.

I peek my head into the Men's Room. Ezra is sitting on a bench playing chess with as boy I think is named Charlie. I pull my head out of the door. the door shuts with a slight bang. I hear a guard laugh quietly at me.

"Oh, be quiet, Ollie," I tease. Oliver Reagus and I grew up together. Mostly he was more Kelly's friend until he started dating Zia. I'm pretty sure they're still together but palace relationships are hard to track.

I turn to face the other guard, refusing to give this task to someone as goofy as Ollie. "Um, excuse me, sir, but would you mind fetching Ezra Winters for me? He's the blue eyed boy at the chess table. Just don't tell him I sent you. Tell him his designer needs him."

The guard slips into the Men's Room.

"Trying to meet up on the DL?" Ollie asks.

"What does that even mean?" I laugh. The guard walks out of the Men's Room with Ezra trailing behind him.

"Thank you," I say, dipping back into my formal voice. I grab Ezra's hand and begin leading him down the hall.

"I thought my tailor needed me," he says.

"Yeah, um, nope," I say.

"Wait. Where are we going?"

I turn to face him. "Would you like to go on a date with me?"

"Um, yes," he says. "But why did you make the guard lie?"

"Listen," I tell him, "the palace is much more complex than you'd think. Appearances are everything. _You_ were the last person to see me before my breakdown and if you were my first public date it'd seem you have an unfair edge."

"You were right," he says as we start walking. "You are good with logic."

"Did the article come out, then?" I ask.

"No, Your Highness," he replies. "But the photos and audio are out."

"You can call me Blue," I say with a dismissive wave of my hand. "How did it look?"

"Did you not listen to it?"

"Of course not. I already know all there is to know about myself."

"Ah."


	10. More Than a Face

The article came out shining. It portrayed me as a logical mind and reflected the few bits of personality I do have. I tried going on a few dates, but none of them were especially remarkable. I haven't kicked anybody out; I don't have any reason, except, oh yeah, I'm the princess and above questioning. I haven't made time for Tobias yet, I haven't even talked to him since that day in the Men's Room. I've been avoiding him. Something about him just irks me.

I've been ghosting around the halls in the time Mom gave me to spend with the Selected. I'm still very excited for the romance, but there hasn't been much of that. Nobody has swept me off my feet, leaving me disillusioned.

I turn a sharp corner and find myself face to face with the man I least want to see right now.

Tobias holds my elbows gently, keeping me afloat. I ignore the urge to look in his eye and instead focus on his chin. There's nothing overly special about his chin, except it doesn't cause my stomach to rock. I pull my elbows out of his hands and cup them against my chest.

"Hello, Mr. Raines," I say to his chin.

"Your Highness," he says. "I haven't seen you in a while."

"Well, that wasn't an entirely a device of chance," I say and immediately regret saying.

"What does that mean?" he asks, a note of anger creeping into his voice. "Are you avoiding me?"

I can't lie to him now. "Yes," I say in a small voice. I meet his gaze, sorry for pegging him for an emotionless shell. Now it may be too late. I don't even know him yet and I already don't want to lose him.

He turns away from me and starts down the hall. I lift my skirt halfway to my knees and chase him down the hall, trying to close the space formed by his large steps with my tiny ones. I grab his shoulder and he lets me turn him toward me.

"I'm sorry," I say breathlessly. My mind scrambles to fix this. "Would you like to go on a date with me?"

"Yes, but, not now." I get it. I get it. He's still mad at me. I'm familiar with the tone of voice used by angry people.

"Alright...I'll meet you after dinner?"

I can't believe the boy I thought was nothing but a face has such a hold on me. He's manipulated my emotions in such a way only my mother does. A shiver of fear runs down my spine. He's more important to me than I had thought.


	11. Chess Metaphors and Whatnot

I twist my hands nervously in front of me. I want to turn back, but I told him I'd meet him here. Dinner was slow, each second dragging on forever. Somehow I'm extremely excited for the date with this bastard. A charming bastard, admittedly.

I knock lightly on the door. I don't want to be seen as demanding, I don't want to offend him even more. Tobias opens the door.

"Ready?" I ask in my trademark quiet voice.

"Yeah," he says, tucking his hands into his pockets. He seems to have put it all behind him. We start down the cavernous halls.

"Forgive me, but I can't seem to remember what province you're from," I say. I look up at him. His hazel eyes are kind of spectacular.

"It's fine," he says. "I'm from Calgary."

"What's that like?" I ask. Of course I've been to Calgary but I've only ever seen it through bulletproof gas.

"Cold," he laughs. "We're bundled up all year around."

"Angeles must have been quite a shock," I reply.

"Yeah, I'm struggling to keep these suits on all day," he pulls on his collar and fans his face.

I laugh before we fall into a comfortable silence. I want to say something, but the words don't exist to describe it. I try to arrange them in my brain but they fall apart before they reach my lips. I keep my eyes trained on the flat sandals poking out from beneath the skirt of my knee length dress. I wish I had worn pants but that seemed inappropriate.

"So what are we up to?" he asks.

"I was thinking we could play a game in the parlor," I respond, glad to break the silence. "Chess, backgammon, poker, checkers...I love games."

"Really? What's your favorite?" he asks as two guards pull open the doors for us. We step in and I wave away the guards inside the room and listen to the door shut.

"Chess," I tell him.

"Then let's play chess," he suggests. We sit opposite each other on two plush chairs. I pull out the box from underneath the table between us.

I set up the polished board and carved pieces. There's no conversation because he's concentrated on beating me, but after years of isolation I've mastered chess. Someone as social as him must have better things to do than practice chess moves. He can't beat me. Or so I think until he corners me and is about to win. I ponder my next move as I chew my pinkie nail.

"It's important to know when you've been beat," I sigh before knocking over my king.

"Care to play again?" he asks.

"I'm not sure we have time," I say. Neither of us move to pack up the board. I look down at my feet and tuck a piece of hair behind my ear.

"Should we go, then?" he asks.

"Yes," I say suddenly standing up. He follows me out the door and down the now dark halls.

"You have quite the talent," he says. Our footsteps echo down the hall.

"Clearly not if I lost the last round," I say. I'm disappointed in myself. We reach his door.

"It's fine," he says, touching my arm, I look up at him. I've never been kissed before, but this seems like an opportune time. The question is, will he have the guts to do it?

I lean forward on my tiptoes, tilting my head to the left. His arm moves from my arm to my lower back. I brush my lips lightly against his, not exactly sure what to do. I've seen enough romantic movies with Kenna and cousin Eadlyn to know the actors always move there open lips against each others. Tobias guides my lips against his and this is about one hundred times better than a movie. I pull away from him.

"Thank you for playing with me." _No, I hope he doesn't take that in the innuendous way._ Maybe I just have a dirty mind.

I walk down the hall away from him, keeping myself from floating away, I feel so light.


	12. A White Rose

I've decided today is the day I take another boy on a date. _Wow, Blue, you're so smart. One date a day and you'll be almost done by the end of the month._

I peek my head into the Men's Room. I haven't any idea of who to take. Until a boy looks up at me. Twan? Twain? Yes, Twain. He smiles a small grin and instantly I feel warm all over. I feel myself growing attached before I even meet him. I curl my finger in his direction in a "come here" gesture. I step back out and wait.

Twain steps out of the heavy door. The first thing I notice is his suit. It's good looking. The best yet. I wonder who his designer is. Maybe they could make me a power suit? One is always needed for budget meetings.

"Would you care to go for a walk with me?" I ask. It's a formality. He most definitely will say yes.

"Yes, Your Highness," he says. We start walking toward the doors to the garden.

"Who's your designer?" I ask. "Your suit looks great."

"Oh, thank you," he says. "I think her name is Ursie Miles. She's quite talented."

"I can see," I say. "So which province are you from?"

"Hansport," he replies.

"Really? What's that like?" I ask him. "What's your family like? How many siblings do you have? What was your favorite subject in school?"

"Oh, God, um...It was good, I guess, I've never known different, so…" I nod. "My family is kind to me, very supporting. I have one little sister; she's obsessed with you. Your style, your speeches, she's your number one fan. I don't really like school so much."

"I'd love to meet your sister sometime," I tell him. "How are you liking the palace?"

"It's beautiful, though I fear I may be growing a stomach from all the delicious food. He pats his flat stomach, making a hollow sound. I laugh.

"There's always that risk, yes." The guards on either side of the door open them for us and we step into the hot Angeles air together. The flowers are extra fragrant today. My lips curl up into an involuntary smile.

"What was it like, growing up in a palace?" he ask.

"Lonely," I answer before I can stop myself. "I did play with the staff's kids and sometimes my siblings but mostly I was just alone, studying, learning new skills, most of them don't pertain to ruling the country, but I'm great with a yo-yo."

"It must be a lot, preparing for the crown your whole life, eh?"

"I guess, but that's why I'm looking for a husband," I tell him. _Hint, hint, cough, cough._

"And what are you looking for, you know, besides hugs?" he needles. I flush. I feel stupid for saying that now.

"Someone willing to be seen as fool sometimes, someone stable and strong," I reply. "Other than that...I'm not sure until I find it. Something special. Do you think that could be you?"

"Not one to beat around the bush, huh?" I shake my head with a laugh. I lift my heavy ice-blue skirt to step over a rock.

"You're here for a reason, right?" I ask.

"I guess," he says. "I'm not sure if I can provide everything you deserve, but I'll try."

"What do I deserve?" I ask. He smiles and turns, picking a white thornless rose. I know that roses are cousin Eadlyn's favorite, she's quite a romantic, but my favorites are orchids. How would he know that, though? He tucks the flower into my dark hair that's been weaved up into an updo.

"That's sweet, but you just picked a flower from my garden and gave it to me." I look up at him.

"But it's sweet, right?"

"Yes, it's sweet," I laugh. _Very sweet._

"This is where I start giving you my world."

"Maybe I'll give you some of mine."

 **A/N: Well that ended on a cute note. We need way more moments like that. Remember, though, this doesn't mean Blue and Twain will end up together. The other boys still have a fighting chance.**


End file.
